Rob gave me this book for Christmas several years ago.

-From my He(Art) Journal, January 21, 2010

“Just returned from meeting with Larry, event planner, at the Hilton.
Took the step and walked across the threshold of my fear.
Rob and I worked on the mission statement last night for
The Gathering: Women Helping Women Across the World.’
When I returned from the Hilton, I had an email from a dear
friend. ‘Janell, the Lord just brought you very strongly to mind
during my prayer time and the words, ‘release you, completely release you,’
kept coming. Hope this means something to you and that
God ministers to you through this word.'”

release, v.t., to set free from restraint of any kind, either physical or moral;
to remove restrictions or obligations from someone or something so that
they become available for other activity.”

Last January, I took a very big step by committing to hosting an event that would raise awareness, rally finances, and recruit volunteers in the fight against human trafficking, specifically the sexual exploitation of women and children in Bangkok and Pattaya, Thailand. Having visited both cities during a  whirlwind two-trips-to-Thailand in November (2009), I came home knowing something had to be done. Convicted by a quote I read by Annie Dieselberg, founder of Night Light International, fears were faced and I moved forward. She writes:

“Awareness is a dangerous thing: it calls us to know and challenges us to act.
To gain knowledge and do nothing with it is a terrible waste.
Ignorance is not bliss; it is simply a glass house in a war zone.
Become aware. Decide to act. It could save someone’s life.”

A few months later, while on a business trip with Rob, I read, “Vocation at its deepest level is not, ‘Oh, boy, do I want to go to this strange place where I have to learn a new way to live and where no one, including me, understands what I’m doing.’ Vocation at its deepest level is, ‘This is something I can’t not do, for reasons I’m unable to explain to anyone else and don’t fully understand myself but that are nonetheless compelling'” (Let Your Life Speak,” by Parker Palmer).

As I look backwards, in order to look forward, I want to remember that in order to fulfill God’s plans in my life, I will have to walk across the threshold of fear and sometimes it won’t make any sense to me or those around me. It only makes sense in hindsight. That’s the thing about hindsight, it is always 20/20.

So, here we are at the very beginning of 2011. Is there something stirring inside of you that seems to be nudging you to step out in faith? Something, perhaps, that makes no sense, but it won’t let go. My desire to help women and children in Thailand wouldn’t let go. It was holding on with two hands. For weeks, even months, I dragged it around like a two year old having a tantrum.

Go ahead. Walk across the threshold of fear and experience a newfound freedom in Christ unlike anything you can imagine. I know for a fact that it might be the hardest thing you will ever do, but you won’t be sorry! The reward will be well worth it. And, be sure to share it with us all! It will build our faith and give us courage!



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